My friend just told me on gchat that my blog posts have been pretty DARK lately. My response? I laughed, because I totally know it's true, and wrote "Good. I'm glad I can show my dark side." The thing is, is that I have a hard time with some movies that have a dark tone/message. I mean I like them because they are always thought provoking, but I normally find that the benefits of watching such a movie do not outweigh the costs. For example, "Fight Club." I just end up feeling weird (and dark). I hope my blog posts haven't been disturbing. I have been going through a hard/stressful period though.
My brother, Hunter, has mentioned someone he knows who he thinks is "going through a hard time" and I always get annoyed with this, because I've met the kid and he seems totally fine. When Hunter mentions this he doesn't provide any explanation as to why he thinks this to be so about this kid. And this is because there isn't any reason/explanation. The kid is not "going through a hard time." He's just simply emotionally unstable. It's important to state things clearly. I've been "going through a hard time" because I was stressed about finding a job, starting to substitute teach at the school I used to teach at before grad school and it not going incredibly smoothly, having to live with my parents as they were getting ready to go on a mission, finishing my thesis. I've had a lot going on. However, I'm not "emotionally unstable." Just clearing that up.
However, actually, Hunter just found out that this guy's brother just overdosed and died yesterday; so yes, having a brother that does drugs would maybe be cause for "going through a hard time," but I think he's been doing drugs for a long time.
I think it's really easy to feel completely overwhelmed in life. Being an adult kind of sucks.
4 comments:
I agree Mer. Being an adult does kind of suck...and I'm finding that most of the time it's not all it's cracked up to be. I appreciate your "dark" posts, cause you're just putting on the screen what most people are too afraid to acknowledge, let alone post on a blog. I miss you friend. I hope things settle down for you. And PS. Right before I read your blog I was contemplating whether or not I am emotionally stable....I'm leaning towards "no." Love you!
Keep posting true to yourself. I love your blog and I love your honesty. I'd like to hear more about how the substituting is going. Weren't you also offered a job to manage teachers at the school (sorry, can't remember the actual job title.)And what did you gain in NYC and do you think you'll go back again?
Remember, especially when you're thinking your adult life stinks, that I admire you and love what you're doing with your adulthood. And you ought to write a memoire--your story-telling is awesome.
thanks for the shout out! i love your dark blogging. it is so much more interesting than your lists of good restaurants (no offense).
xoxoxo miss you. love cath
I'm wondering if there comes a point, say senility later in life, when it becomes okay to act like a kid again. I'm waiting for that day. It's been a dark year. At least you're not alone in that.
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