I was reminded recently that I once voiced (in a letter) my feeling to my brother, Spencer, that I wished I was a boy. This was when he was on his mission, and I was going through a difficult stage (when am I not?). Instead of ignoring the absurd comment, he addressed it (being the sensitive guy that he is). "What's this about you wishing you were a boy?" he wrote. I'm sure I had contemplated the differences and pros/cons many a time, but this was the only time I outright stated that I wished I was.
Life is easier for boys. I'm pretty much decided upon it.
If I didn't have to worry about the following things, stress in my life could be substantially lessened due to decreased expenditures and the increased time which I'd gain from their relief.
1. Hair. Okay so maybe guys shave their face. Let's consider all the hair areas I have dealt with in the past couple hours or will deal with in the next couple. These would be: shaving yesterday (a good 20 minutes) -- legs and underarms, of course; bleaching lip; cream hair remover on face; plucking eyebrows; bikini wax scheduled Wednesday AM; covering gray with powder spray on days my hair has been washed; washing hair (a good 15 minutes); hair appointments (a good $150 every 3 months).
2. Working out. LOTS of guys don't ever work out. Of course, lots of girls don't work out either; however, lets face it -- failure to work out is a problem for many more a girl than boy.
3. Make-up/skin. From the creams/lotion that decrease hair growth, the ones to eliminate ingrown hairs after waxing, the ones to decrease pores, acne lotions/face washes, lotion for tightening skin/eliminating cellulite, eye cream, SPF moisturizer, day moisturizer, night moisturizer, clay masks, exfoliating washes and masks, the list just goes on and on and on. I'll admit, ALL of them, I use.
4. Our monthly visiter. Men don't need to worry if they fall asleep without using the restroom during a certain week of the month. We, however, wake up very unpleasantly to realize if we had only remembered the old-fashioned winged protector, we would have saved ourselves a lot of bleach and extra loads of laundry. Of course, there's also some panic that accompanies our daily exit out the door during this week, as well. Did I remember my tampons? Will I have to ask to borrow from everybody in my office all day or can I get to the store to buy yet another box of tampons?
I think I'm done. I don't even consider myself a girly girl. What the hell is wrong with me? Is anybody else exhausted? I just can't keep it up.
2 comments:
You're beautiful. Can't you simplify? Test just washing your hair, shaving and doing just makeup and a face cleanser at night? Some lotion on your face after the cleanser?
I've gotten so annoyed at girl routines too, and I just cut back. I still do the things I like (like Bath and Body works lotion when I want to smell great) but I cut out or cut down on other things and love it. Especially in the summer. I think the summer invites a more relaxed approach to all that. Except the shaving. You have to shave more than you'd like then.
You know what else I've noticed? Women in Idaho Falls look like they stepped out of magazines ALL the time. It's kind of incredible. But DC girls are more relaxed. We can be comfortable in a ponytail because we know we're hot enough without extra hours of coiffing. You're a beautiful DC babe, so you can cut back. I love your updates!
Meredith, you don't know the half of the trouble with being a girl since you happen to be a very beautiful girl. Tara, you too!
I am glad I am a girl (in elementary school I noticed that girls were obviously much smarter--a characteristic that evens out, I guess, over time; in high school I felt sorry for guys that they ahd to serve missions!).
Anyway, my husband has often pointed out a lamentable but true fact: men just have a lot more control over their lives than women. I think that this disadvantage has diminished over time in many ways, but it is still true in ways that do matter.
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